March 22, 2006
Infected
I've been out for a few days due to a disgusting virus. Or three.
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I got the dreaded virus. It was hideous. There was nothing I could do to heal my precious computer. Finally, I took it to an "expert". He worked on it for days and it is finally well and healthy in its home next to my desk.
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And I'm back online. But I have fallen far behind on some very important work, so I won't be online much this week. Add to that, my younger daughter's birthday party is this weekend, so any free time I have away from work projects will be devoted to pulling together a birthday party that time somehow got away from me on taking care of details. I even tried to get everything taken care of very early (two months ago), but it never got past the inquiry stage. ugh.
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Next week, I will have a couple extra children for spring break. We'll have lots of fun, especially doing whatever princess Little A wants on Thursday, the actual day of her birthday. But I'll be busy, so that will render me offline for a good couple weeks.
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We're doing great here, very busy. Very happy. I started physical therapy on my shoulder this week, which I loathe, but I know this will make me heal much much faster - or rather heal at all, since I've not.
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Enjoy your spring breaks, enjoy your children, enjoy your husbands and your extended families. Until next time, God Bless you.
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March 15, 2006
Thwarted
Tonight, Little A kept calling out "Mommy and Daddy, I want to kiss you!" (this was after we both had put her to bed - she tends to stall on the actual sleeping part of bedtime) After she'd called out twice, we looked at each other and nodded. I called to her to "(Little A), just go to sleep and stop yelling!"
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Then we raced into their bedroom, I leapt first onto her bed and A second. Instead of her erupting into fits of giggles, she burst into tears. Maybe it was partially because poor thing has an ear infection and is feeling generally grumpy....
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We wanted to cover her in kisses, even though we don't normally encourage her calling out to us for no reason. Apparently, she thought we were coming in to punish her for shouting.
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I guess we'd better start going in for the second kisses more often. :)
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March 14, 2006
"God Bless Mommy...that she won't kick us"
You know when your child prays that, something is going on! I must have been grumpy last night when we were out to dinner. I don't know where Little A came up with the kicking part, seeing as how I've NEVER kicked her or her sister!, but my mood was such that I actually did want to kick her under the table after that statement was made part of the family prayer.
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Can't say for sure why I was grumpy, other than feeling like I'd had a long day. A friend collapsed after our mom's group in the morning (possibly just from her first migraine, but she ended up spending most of the rest of the day at the ER having tests done - those thankfully showed up clear of anything serious, but we didn't find that out until 10 pm). I was back and forth on the phone with my FIL all day, since the above friend happens also to be the daughter of a couple of my in-laws' friends - oh, and my husband has a minor health issue right now that his dad kept calling to check on.
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I guess I'll talk about that a little: Saturday, we were busy all day preparing for the arrival of our guests. This meant that we were basically doing some long overdue work on the house (I was scrubbing bathroom floors, A was planting flowers out front). After our guests left (I will talk about the visit in another entry), A complained of something in his eye. We tried flushing out his eye, but we could see a speck that wasn't moving. We hoped it would work its way out during his slumber. It didn't. I packed up the girls and we headed to the ER first thing in the morning (they even ate their dry cereal in the car on the way, that's how quickly we ran out). After many hours (thank Mimi for portable dvd! And M&T for the iPod) of me keeping the girls quiet in the waiting room and not knowing what was going on with A, he popped his head out and let us know that he hadn't even been seen by a doctor yet. !!!! Oy!!! Finally, someone came in and numbed his eye, then got the thing out. She noted that his eye is rather scratched and referred him to follow up with an opthamologist within 24 hours. He was given antibiotic drops to put in every 4 hours and a scrip for painkiller. Well, the eye dr. yesterday said that there seems to be a spot of rust on his eye (how did he have metal in his eye?!), so she took a needle and scraped the surface of his eye. This is the part of the story where I got physically ill as he described the fact that the numbing drops had not taken effect. She prescribed a stronger antibiotic that he's supposed to drop in every hour and he goes back again today. I hope he doesn't have to get the scraping done again (although, I am sure his hope for this far outweighs my own).
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So, this doesn't explain why I was grumpy yesterday. Stress? Oh, the other phone calls..... Last week, I took the girls to have fasting lipid profiles done, at the request of their new pediatrician. I have a scary family history of cholesterol problems and he wanted to know how the girls' numbers were - better to start changes now if they are showing signs of genetic issues. We got a call that V's blood test results came back normal. A must have misunderstood the call because he thought the results were for both girls. I got a call about 20 minutes later about Little A's results. Hers are crazy. Something about a referral to some kind of specialist.... blah blah blah. I asked the nurse to have the pediatrician look at the results and call me back personally (he happens to be a new acquaintance at church). I'm waiting to hear back from him now. I can't imagine why she'd be referred to a specialist (the nurse had no idea what kind of doctor the referral was for!). So, I guess I was a little wigged out at dinner. And after dinner.
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On the way home, I commented that I didn't feel like going to the gym to workout and hanging out in the hot tub with my girlfriend after her cardio class. I'd rather collapse on the couch and wallow in my miserable mood - or rather, I didn't feel like socializing. As we drove past the community center, I knew I'd feel better working out instead of sitting on the couch. When we got home, I shouted at V for being obstinate and A pushed me out the door. I did pack a plastic cup, can of diet coke with lime and a bottle of vanilla vodka and wear my swimsuit under my workout clothes.
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After sweating on the elliptical, I met my friend and few others from the cardio class (I am not allowed to do the class again until I have medical clearance that my shoulder is fully healed). We four women headed out to the pool and had a grand ol' time drinking our drinks and soaking in the hot bubbly water. I'd tell you about the cute guys that came in after their workouts, but it'd sound silly. But it's true and one of my neighbors actually was quizzing the one and wants to introduce her daughter to him. It was hilarious!
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So, A was right in shoving me out the door. I needed to go work out. And the drinks with some women in the hot tub did my attitude some good. We have a date for next Monday and I hope I'll have my walking dates the rest of this week with my girlfriend. I'm actually starting to LIKE exercising - it's actually a part of my day I look forward to.
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But, I'm still praying my friend is okay. I'm praying A's eye heals quickly and well. I'm praying Little A's test results aren't as wonky as the nurse let on and if they are, the pediatrician and I can come with a plan of action. I'm praying that Rachael is okay and that her test results come back clear and that her fever was gone after a good night's sleep last night.
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I'm off to shower and get ready for my doctor appointment - just a physical and to talk about my shoulder and some moles. I'm sorry that it sounds like we're all falling apart, but I promise it is just that stuff is happening all at the same time.
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I hope you have a blessed day.
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March 08, 2006
Brevity Works on Occasion
I can't believe my carelessness just lost a LONG post. What a dope I am.
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No time left, so I will briefly say that I am good.
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Walking a lot. Enjoying it. Love that I can now walk 4 miles in less than an hour without feeling like I'm gonna keel over.
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Not eating enough. Gotta fix that one.
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Really enjoy my work at the crisis pregnancy center.
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Love my family. Can't wait to have the girls help me in the kitchen today. For some reason, this will be the highlight of our day because I just haven't been wanting them in the kitchen lately (don't want to clean up a bigger mess). My husband is wonderful - brought me flowers and a beautiful card twice in the last couple weeks. Once for no reason and once for the anniversary that he says we don't "celebrate."
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Lots of work to do today. Looking forward to sharing the evening with Sandi's family this Saturday. I want my home to be warm and inviting and CLEAN! for that visit. And well, we are tired of the clutter on the counters lately anyway. Sandi coming is just great motivation to get it done.
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A special congratulations to Kelly and Kevin for the news of their pregnancy!
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Have a beautiful and blessed day.
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March 05, 2006
And the world is righted *edited*
I just have to get that other post off the top. I appreciate all the prayers and support and hopes for the future. You all make me realize why I keep blogging.
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I wanted to just post quickly before we go to our second baseball game in three days. It's fun, taking the girls to the ballpark and trying to teach them the rules of baseball. We have killer seats, so we have a good time, in spite of the fact that my team is not doing so hot so far this pre-season.
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***(EDITED TO ADD: They actually are doing great, but lost HUGE when we saw them Friday. And yesterday? They won! It was a great game and we made it all the way to the ninth inning - yay, Little A! - but still left before the top of the ninth was done to avoid traffic leaving the game.) The coolest? V kept asking if we could stay for the whole game. She was thrilled when we told her that we were leaving with only 2 outs remaining.***
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Life is getting a little hairy here, this next month will be a mixture of happy and sad. Little A's birthday is at the end of the month, so I'm planning her party for in 3 weeks.
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Tomorrow is not only A's and my 7th church wedding anniversary, but it would be Pop's 54th birthday. One year ago today, we took him and my mom out for breakfast - and had the pleasure of seeing him with his brand new motorcycle and just how happy he was to have it.
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So, some bittersweet memories mixed in with some good stuff and some bad stuff. Next weekend we will welcome Sandi and her family into our home for dinner. Spring Break will bring lots of time with various friends in the area and possibly a couple trips to the zoo. Little A's birthday party.... Her birthday and the 2 year anniversary of the death of our sweet Gabriella and the birth of her body.... Thank God for Little A. Her birth has been the bright spot of the spring season for us.
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Oh, the reality of three children seems pretty ridiculous after a night with my cousin's daughter being with us. She's a great kid, but three is just so much more work! I don't know how any of you do it. I'm certainly back to my 4 is perfect mindset (but still have this nagging sense of hope for just. one. more.)
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We are so blessed. I hope your weekend is filled with as much love as mine has been, only with less traffic. :)
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March 02, 2006
Thank you for riding the rollercoaster and enjoy the rest of your day!
Okay. Finally, the ride is over.
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And I'm feeling awfully sad over the end.
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The doctor made a mistake.
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I'll be okay in a couple weeks (maybe even less), the reality is that I came to terms with the miscarriage about a month ago anyway, so this would have been an incredible surprise blessing.
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It's funny how changed life can be in 36 hours. It looks like when I feel I've made substantial progress on the getting fit trail, we shall revisit the idea of more children. This week we learned that we'd love more. That we'd be blessed to be gifted one more. Right now, I'm just trying to remind myself that 50 hours ago, I was perfectly happy with our beautiful family of four.
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Back to reality...
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March 01, 2006
True Shock *Edited*
It's embarrassing not to know what's going on with your body.
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When you've just told your gyn at your annual visit that you had a(nother) early miscarriage last month, it's extra embarrassing when she assesses that you likely didn't have a miscarriage at all.
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So, we don't know. We suspect, but there's a likelihood that what happened last month was break-through bleeding.
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That would mean we're at about 9 weeks, which is shocking. But exciting. And anxiety-laden. And somewhat worrisome (where are my symptoms?!). And exciting. And explanatory of some of my behavior in the past weeks (exhausted, emotional, did I mention tired? Oh, and let's not forget that lump I felt way down in my abdomen that I was worried was a hernia or muscle strain after doing a hundred crunches last week - that? probably my uterus. I am so dense.). And exciting!
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Of course, right now, we know nothing. I'm not one who felt like I needed to run out and buy a urine test after going to the lab for a blood draw. But today, I'm feeling differently. I'm anxious. I want to know. I don't want to wait a day or two for numbers that at this stage might mean only the need for further investigation. There was initially the concern of an ectopic, but after doing an exam, my doctor thinks that isn't probably the situation.
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So, we wait. Not-so-patiently. And we pray that if I am, in fact, pregnant, that all is well and healthy - and if it's not all and well and healthy, that I have an attitude of acceptance of whatever is God's will.
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So, if you pray, please slip a prayer or two in for us. I'll keep you posted.
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Update: Today at work I did a urine pregnancy test and it was negative. This just brings up more questions, since my uterus was all enlarged and stuff. One person told me that just because the urine test was negative doesn't mean I didn't get pregnant in February (though my last period was short and light and now I'm late anyway by 4 days for this period). So, we're still in wait and see mode. I have to be honest and tell you that I was beyond disappointed when I saw that negative test this afternoon though. I wonder if it's a bad idea to think about TRYING to get pregnant? I suppose that's a conversation for after we find out what's going on now.
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